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kimmy
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# Posted: 27 Jul 2008 16:44 - Edited by: kimmy
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I tried to fit this in the part 2 thread but it didn't work grrrrr so here are some more hours in the life of pregnant willy wonka.
Willy if you haven't read the updated part 2 yet, read it before this one lmao
9pm
The doorbell rings again, I go to answer it & there stood kahuna & sexylady, "omg please don't tell me you have come here to cause willy more upset?"
"No I promise you I have come to apologise," he replies.
"hmmm ok you can come in, but if you upset him then you will be going straight back out of that door."
As I walked in with kahuna & sexylady following right behind, willy looked up & his smile dropped. "What did you let them in for?" He shouts, "sexy was the one that started the watermelon thing off & kahuna carried it on!"
"We know mate & we're both sorry for that, I wanted to come & make peace with you & start over."
Willy doesn't know whether he wants to laugh or cry, he was looking around at everyone in the room thinking to himself, what if I accept his apology & it's just a trick? What if he still believes Charlie is a watermelon & this is all just a ploy to trick kimmy & I? He turns to kahuna after what seems like hours & says, "I will have to really think about this, I will sleep on it & let you know tomorrow. I'm pretty tired now I think it's time everyone left."
They all made their way to the front door, kahuna turns around & says to willy, "I mean it mate, no more upsetting you."
10pm
Willy was laying down on the sofa looking confused, "kimmy do you think that kahuna is still plotting something?"
I sat down in the small space that wasn't taken up by his bump & took his hands in mine, "I don't know honey it all seems a bit sudden for everyone to want to leave it all alone."
He looked even more worried "mmmm that's what i'm thinking, i'm going up to bed now I feel so tired, are you coming up?"
I will do soon, I need to put some of these boxes out of the way, I keep tripping over them."
"Ok love, cya when you come up."
He very slowly wonders upstairs, then I heard him mumbling to himself, "damn it I need to pee again, come on Charlie this is torture."
11pm
I finally make it upstairs, willy is sound asleep. As I started drifting off the screams started again.
"No no no no Charlie is not a watermelon, leave our baby alone you cannibals."
I thought to myself, when will he have a night without the terrible nightmares?
He started screaming, I tried to soothe him but he was in too much of a deep sleep, "Please leave all of us alone."
Then he sits bolt upright, looks at me & says "kimmy I can't cope with these nightmares they seem so real, I wake up & have to make sure Charlie is still in my belly."
I put his head on my lap & stroked his hair, "It's ok honey I won't let anyone hurt you or Charlie. Come on try to get some sleep, I will be right here."
"Ok, but before that could you massage some stretch mark cream into my belly please?"
I got the cream & said, "Of course I can."
12am
He's still stirring in his sleep, he hasn't called out again yet, I tried turning over to go to sleep but willy grabs my hand, "where are you going? Don't leave me on my own please love."
"I promise you I am going no where, I was just turning over to go sleep."
"Oh, argh I need to pee again, this is getting worse the more I relax the more I need to pee." He waddles off to the toilet, as he's sat on the loo he starts to wonder what Charlie will look like, damn it all I have in my mind is a bloody watermelon face, will our baby be normal? Will Charlie prove them right & us wrong? As his mind wonders off into more deep thought he started falling asleep on the loo.
1am
He suddenly wakes up & realises he's still sat on the toilet, omg how long have I been here for, he thought to himself, he tried standing up but he's stuck on the seat. "kimmy wake up, I need help."
I looked at the time, 1am is that all the time is I thought. "kimmy please hurry I can't get off the loo."
I ran down to the bathroom & started pulling him up, I started laughing. He looked at me "What the hell are you laughing at? This isn't funny."
I tried clearing my throat, "umm yeah actually it is." As I gave his arms one last pull I fell down on the floor, willy started laughing, "Oh so it's not funny when it happens to you but you find it hilarious when it happens to me huh?"
He started laughing even harder, "mmmm yip,"
"Come on get your butt back up to bed."
2am
We still hadn't fallen asleep, willy turns to me & says, "I feel restless, I can't sleep, all I keep thinking about is kahuna & if he really means what he's saying. I need something to take my mind off it all." He gets up & goes out of the room, 5 minutes later he comes back in, "I know what I can do, paint Charlies's bedroom, get it ready."
I looked at him, "Are you serious? We haven't got the paint yet."
"Yip i'm serious, come on we'll go to the 24hr DIY store, please kimmy? When we get back home you can go back to bed while I paint,"
"Hmmm, come on then, but I don't want to spend hours there because you can't find the right colour."
He had a cheeky smile on his face, "I know what colour to get... PURRRPLE"
3am
We have been looking around the store for 30 minutes & willy is getting angry, "Why do they have every single purple apart from Barney purple?" He goes over to the assistant "Where is your Barney purple?"
The assistant took a big gulp & looked at willy with frightened eyes. "umm i'm sorry sir but we have sold out, we are not due a delivery for another 2 ½ weeks."
"2 ½ weeks?? That's no good Charlie will be born by then, I demand you get some in right now!"
I quickly pulled him away from the assistant, "You can't speak to him like that."
"Well he asked for it!! No purple Barney paint indeed! What is the world coming to?"
Before I could reply the shop assistant came over with a couple pots of purple paint, he started shaking as he said, "It.. It.. It's not Barney purple but if you add this darker shade to it you will get the right colour."
Willy thanks him & we go to pay.
4am
Willy has been hard at work in Charlie's room, he starts whistling the umpa lumpa song as he's painting the walls. He feels Charlie moving around in his belly, he puts his hands on his belly forgetting he had purple paint all over them & says to Charlie, "You are going to love this, I have been working so hard on it."
He finishes up & takes a step back, looks around the room & breathes a sigh of relief, "Wow it's even better than my tv room, Charlie I think we'll end up swapping rooms at this rate. Mmmm shall I go & wake kimmy up? Or will she be angry?" He couldn't contain his excitement anymore, he came running in, "kimmy wake up i've finished Charlie's room, come see it."
"grrrr ok i'm getting up, so much for being able to sleep."
"It will be worth it honey, wait til ya see it." He looked like a kid at christmas waiting to open his presents.
I walked into Charlie's room & to my surprise it looked amazing, "wow willy you've done all of this?"
"Yip, but now i'm worn out, I think I will go to bed now, another busy day for us tomorrow."
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hovis
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# Posted: 27 Jul 2008 16:48
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lmao hahaha ...........glad I aint got a mrs with a sense of humour and stretches reality even if it does shrink back. lol kimmy
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hovis
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# Posted: 27 Jul 2008 17:10
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Willy stop worrying m8.......went to Blackpool and a fortune teller showed me in her crystal ball what you were having buddy........It was a pic of the happy Wonka family and guess what,..........noooo watermelon phewww.
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kimmy
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# Posted: 27 Jul 2008 17:12
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pmsl hovis soooooo funny hehehehehe
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craigd
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# Posted: 27 Jul 2008 17:54
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lmao u 2 hahahaha is the one on the right supposed to be kimmy
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neutron
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# Posted: 27 Jul 2008 18:09
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lol
was right u r gonna do round the clock
darn is this his (her) pregnancy or
u comfoting him over watermelon nightmares
hahaha
:P
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CMwonka
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# Posted: 28 Jul 2008 00:29
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lol lol lol pmsl....................OMG i really have wet myself...lol
kimmy you are mental...lol
hovis omg lol nothing else i can say lol
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kimmy
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# Posted: 28 Jul 2008 04:49
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lol craig I can't tell you that lmao
pmsl neutron only got 4 more hours left to do hehe
willy lmao  yep i'm mental that's why I fit right in with you lot, we're all a bunch of crazy people hehehehe
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nutcase
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# Posted: 28 Jul 2008 05:39
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very good kimmy but speak for your self i am sain co perard to u lot lol
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kimmy
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# Posted: 28 Jul 2008 06:30
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You're joking right Tina? lmao
I was sane before I met you pmsl
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hovis
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# Posted: 28 Jul 2008 09:33
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I agree kimmy I was sane before I met her as well.........but now I am a fully blown "Tina fruit case", with a bigger smile on my face lol
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kimmy
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# Posted: 28 Jul 2008 13:32
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lol hovis yep I agree with that, also I became even more insane when I met you lot especially you & wonka pmsl
willy I have just thought of something, you know you said you wet yourself? Well..... Are you sure it wasn't your waters breaking? lmao hehehehehe
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kimmy
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# Posted: 28 Jul 2008 17:06
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I have updated it..
This is the final hours in a day of willy wonka's pregnancy
hehehehehehe
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hovis
Member
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# Posted: 28 Jul 2008 17:12
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Hahaha I love you kimmy and I love your humour. had to say it here, please don't let willy breast feed and make him change wallpaper. Thank you for the smile lol
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kimmy
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# Posted: 28 Jul 2008 17:44
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hehehehehe
hovis sooooo funny, i'm glad you enjoyed it.
I think Charlie will be on the Malibu or Jack Daniels early, so I don't think we have to worry about willy breast feeding lmao
God I bet men are feeling so lucky they don't have to actually go through any of this pmsl
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CMwonka
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# Posted: 29 Jul 2008 12:04
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kimmy
lmao lmao lmao
thank you, you have made my day again. i can always rely on you to put a smile on my face.
lmao lmao lmao
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kimmy
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# Posted: 29 Jul 2008 13:33
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hehehehehe
That's put a smile on my face willy.
Glad you have enjoyed the stories.
Hmmm need a new project now, damn this is gonna hurt trying to think of something lmao
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hovis
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# Posted: 29 Jul 2008 13:54 - Edited by: hovis
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Ok make a video/cd of how to get your figure back after birth. Jane Fonda done it and you have a better bod and a nicer smile lol. Then post it on U Tube and we can all ogle hmmmm praise you lmao
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kimmy
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# Posted: 29 Jul 2008 14:02
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hmmm well hovis you see considering the fact that willy is the one that's pregnant & not me, you will have to speak to him about that lmao
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hovis
Member
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# Posted: 29 Jul 2008 14:24 - Edited by: hovis
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Who wants to watch willie gyrating in leggings and a tutu. As his wife you have to show him how to do it and don't worry we are all grown up here, so don't spare the physical. Can see Olivia newton kimmy doing her thing for the obese on site, very charitable kim. pmsl go girl go.
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kimmy
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# Posted: 29 Jul 2008 17:55
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hmmm
The only thing I could show him is how to lift his arm up & down lol
He can learn that while I drink my Malibu lmao.
I have a good one for when Charlie is born though.... How will willy wonka cope with nappy changes, sleepless nights (cos you know I will be catching up on my sleep) bottle feeds aswell as trying to look pretty lmao
Actually scratch that last one he will look hot no matter what hehehe
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hovis
Member
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# Posted: 29 Jul 2008 17:58
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Kimmy I am worried about you hun! You reckon a pregnant bloke looks hot? God help mankind, i need a drink lmao
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kimmy
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# Posted: 29 Jul 2008 18:04
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Hey he's my hubby of course I think he's hot. He's the hottest guy on this site.. *kimmy wonders off into a day dream*
If it was any other pregnant man they would not get a second look.
My hubby is the only one for me. He may be fat & pregnant but he's all mine lmao
ummm anyway I think I will go & join my hubby in bed, he's been watching Barney. It should be finished by now & i'm on a promise woohoo lmao lmao
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hovis
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# Posted: 29 Jul 2008 18:15
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The only promise you will be on with the "she male", is "I promise, if you let me keep my Barney pyjamas on". I need a bucket........pmsl
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CMwonka
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# Posted: 30 Jul 2008 08:51 - Edited by: CMwonka
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click the link
HE HE HE HE HE
sorry its a bit childish....lol lol lol lol
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kimmy
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# Posted: 30 Jul 2008 08:57
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hehehehehe
Soooo soooo soooo funny
Thank you willy you have put a huge smile on my face.
Very very good hehehehehe
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hovis
Member
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# Posted: 30 Jul 2008 09:02 - Edited by: hovis
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Willy hehehe lmao........thanks for using pics. You made me smile when I hurt. lol m8
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nutcase
Member
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# Posted: 30 Jul 2008 15:49
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very very good hunny lol
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